(or even better, hits you playfully) you are now the sexy stranger. If you ask her to come with you to be alone in a different part of the venue (party, bar, etc.) without leaving the venue, then youre sexy and safe. If shes willing to leave the venue with you to go anywhere else (not necessarily your place or hers), then you are partners.   Establishing trust and safety In a moment, we are going to go through an outline of the steps you have to take to transition through the four phases of courtship. Note that once you have the part about being compelling down (all the material from Chapter 8), the main things you have to establish are trust and safety. Here are some techniques for doing precisely that. Some are obvious; others are completely counterintuitive.   Trust. My definition of trust is the ability to predict someones behavior. As such, it has less to do with what you do and more with how you do it. Women will hook up with dangerous, roguish, outwardly untrustworthy men - bikers, players, tough guys - partially\r\nbecause they know what to expect from them. Its the namby-pamby, passive-aggressive guy that they cant trust. And so the most potent way of establishing trust in womans mind is trusting yourself and being comfortable with who you are. This reminds me of Nathaniel Brandens definition of self-esteem: "To trust yourself and know that you are deserving of happiness." This all goes back to our discussion of being a man. Re-read that section. In the meantime, what communicates your total self-acceptance is congruence - a total alignment of thought and physiology. That means that if youre attracted to a woman, you project